Hold Fast

What I've learned in my life, the one thing greater than my strife is your grasp...

I've probably posted about this before but I like this song. A lot. Could be why it comes up often. I heard it on the way to work this morning. I had a bad day yesterday. It happens. I don't like to be rushed, scheduled minute by minute and for approximately 23 days (total guess), that's my life. And I'm frustrated by it. And the thing is that this is the way that I run my life. I add too much. I try too much. And then I melt down. You would think that at 35, I might be able to control the impulse to add more. You'd be wrong. I do not learn. Until I'm going through the breakdown, I'm firmly in control of it all. And then I'm not and I want to just let it all, every single bit, good and bad, just let it go. And as I'm typing, I'm realzing that I'll probably never be able to change that. It will take supernatural help to change the patterns of 35 years.

Psalm 139 For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.