When I think about how different I am on the inside compared to what I show the world, I start to wonder. I had this conversation with a friend yesterday about how the people in my Sunday school class don't really know me. Some of them have seen glimpses of me but they don't really know me. Because I don't let them. There are people around me who know more about the real me than others...and it isn't always who you'd think. It seems that it's harder to let church people know that I'm not all together than others who freely let me know that they are not all together. I'm not sure why I'm thinking about that today. I meant to post about prayer, this verse specifically.
Matthew 6
Prayer
5"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.
I'm preparing to start a work Bible study. And the conversation in my head is always the same...
I can do that. I should be doing that. I did it before and it was fine. I can do this.
Then count it down to "go time" and the conversation changes....
What was I thinking? I can't do this. I don't want to do this. I'm not smart enough to do this. Prayer? I'm the worst pray-er that I know. How can I teach anyone what I don't know? How do I get out of this? I can't get out of this. God, help!
Father, you made me as I am and you know what I need before I ask you. What a gift that is. Please help me prepare, guide the right people to the study, and give me the words. I'm afraid to mess up here, but I know that you can accomplish great things in spite of me. Jesus taught us how to pray. Help us all understand what that means.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Monday, April 7, 2008
Significance
1 Chronicles 4:9-10 (New International Version)
9 Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, [a] saying, "I gave birth to him in pain." 10 Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.
I think that many Christians feel like prayer has to be impressive to be significant. How many times have I listened to an eloquent prayer in church and thought , "I could never pray like that." I read Bruce Wilkinson's book on the Prayer of Jabez last night...a short, easy read...about a prayer than can change lives. And really, who are we trying to impress? God knows our hearts. How much simpler it would be to pray "Bless me, enlarge my territory, be with me, protect me from harm." It worked for Jabez. In a long list of names, Jabez stands out as more honorable...not a bad goal.
9 Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, [a] saying, "I gave birth to him in pain." 10 Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.
I think that many Christians feel like prayer has to be impressive to be significant. How many times have I listened to an eloquent prayer in church and thought , "I could never pray like that." I read Bruce Wilkinson's book on the Prayer of Jabez last night...a short, easy read...about a prayer than can change lives. And really, who are we trying to impress? God knows our hearts. How much simpler it would be to pray "Bless me, enlarge my territory, be with me, protect me from harm." It worked for Jabez. In a long list of names, Jabez stands out as more honorable...not a bad goal.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
So, does it really work?
Genesis 24
10 Then the servant took ten of his master's camels and left, taking with him all kinds of good things from his master. He set out for Aram Naharaim and made his way to the town of Nahor. 11 He had the camels kneel down near the well outside the town; it was toward evening, the time the women go out to draw water.
12 Then he prayed, "O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a girl, 'Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,' and she says, 'Drink, and I'll water your camels too'-let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master."
I've mentioned that I've been working on my own independent study of prayer. This is a prayer of one of Abraham's servants. And God answered it by sending Rebekah, and she did as he prayed and she was the one for Isaac. More than once I've wished God would just send the sign, the burning bush, the cloud of smoke leading the way. And I have prayed a prayer like this when I was scared to death that God was calling me to make a mission trip. And he answered each prayer in a way that was without question an affirmative: Yes. Go. God is full of mercy and he knew that nothing less would get me moving. But I've also wondered whether this reflects a lack of faith. Is this a way to test God or is this a way to search God's will and know?
I've been thinking about this for the past week because I feel like I'm facing a big decision. I know how I feel in my heart, but my head tries to be logical, to make the proper decision regardless of how I "feel" right now...the best decision for my future. And, as logic really isn't my strong point, especially in personal decision making, it's a struggle. So today I was driving on the way to my next hurdle, the normal feeling of dread riding shotgun, and I was just basically talking to God...and I said, "You know, if I don't see results tonight or if this person calls me to tell me she can't make it again, I'm going to know the right decision to make" never really believing that it would ever be that simple. I arrive. I'm bustling to be prepared. And she calls to say she won't be able to make it. So...now what? Is that answered prayer? After the first epic battle over the Peru trip, I've never believed in coincidence. If I put on my ill-fitting logic hat again, here's what I know:
1. God answers prayer every day. Maybe not always in ways that I hear, but I believe they're answered.
2. God answers through His word and His people. Both seem to be at work here.
3. I've been asking, seeking, knocking for some time. God promised to answer.
4. When I think of making this decision, I feel peace. I worry over tomorrow, but today I will feel happy, unburdened, at peace. Since God has promised to take care of tomorrow, maybe today is what matters.
I think I have an answer.
Quick, somebody with better logic...point out the flaws in my reasoning!
10 Then the servant took ten of his master's camels and left, taking with him all kinds of good things from his master. He set out for Aram Naharaim and made his way to the town of Nahor. 11 He had the camels kneel down near the well outside the town; it was toward evening, the time the women go out to draw water.
12 Then he prayed, "O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a girl, 'Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,' and she says, 'Drink, and I'll water your camels too'-let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master."
I've mentioned that I've been working on my own independent study of prayer. This is a prayer of one of Abraham's servants. And God answered it by sending Rebekah, and she did as he prayed and she was the one for Isaac. More than once I've wished God would just send the sign, the burning bush, the cloud of smoke leading the way. And I have prayed a prayer like this when I was scared to death that God was calling me to make a mission trip. And he answered each prayer in a way that was without question an affirmative: Yes. Go. God is full of mercy and he knew that nothing less would get me moving. But I've also wondered whether this reflects a lack of faith. Is this a way to test God or is this a way to search God's will and know?
I've been thinking about this for the past week because I feel like I'm facing a big decision. I know how I feel in my heart, but my head tries to be logical, to make the proper decision regardless of how I "feel" right now...the best decision for my future. And, as logic really isn't my strong point, especially in personal decision making, it's a struggle. So today I was driving on the way to my next hurdle, the normal feeling of dread riding shotgun, and I was just basically talking to God...and I said, "You know, if I don't see results tonight or if this person calls me to tell me she can't make it again, I'm going to know the right decision to make" never really believing that it would ever be that simple. I arrive. I'm bustling to be prepared. And she calls to say she won't be able to make it. So...now what? Is that answered prayer? After the first epic battle over the Peru trip, I've never believed in coincidence. If I put on my ill-fitting logic hat again, here's what I know:
1. God answers prayer every day. Maybe not always in ways that I hear, but I believe they're answered.
2. God answers through His word and His people. Both seem to be at work here.
3. I've been asking, seeking, knocking for some time. God promised to answer.
4. When I think of making this decision, I feel peace. I worry over tomorrow, but today I will feel happy, unburdened, at peace. Since God has promised to take care of tomorrow, maybe today is what matters.
I think I have an answer.
Quick, somebody with better logic...point out the flaws in my reasoning!
Get the Drift
This Sunday we studied a little more on Jacob's life. Jacob is another one of those characters that really gives a regular person hope. Jacob was so imperfect. His name says it all: Deceiver. He tricked his brother out of his blessing as first born, ran away in fear for his life, and even though God came to him personally, he continued to try to weasel out of conflict instead of automatically doing the right thing. Sounds like someone I might know. And still, God would use him to save the world. The last king descended from Jacob/Israel: Jesus. I guess if God waited on one of us to always do the right thing...well, it would be a really long wait. This time around, we looked at what Jacob did after his sons destroyed Shechem. When his life and his entire family are in danger because of his inaction and lack of leadership, then Jacob takes action...bury the idols, let's go back to where we should be. Until that point, it looks like they followed the normal path...following God perfectly is just a little too hard, let's try something a little easier. And before you know it, you have idols that you worship instead of the God of Israel, the God who called Abraham and Isaac and Jacob, who spoke to them personally and through them made it possible for me to belong.
It's a good thing Jacob was a part of the legacy. God made a promise to Abraham and he kept it to Jacob, protecting him from the consequences of his actions. In this one time, Jacob's entire family/tribe could have been destroyed. Instead God reminded him of where he started, sending him back to Bethel where he met God in the first place. Some returns are easier than others, aren't they? Sometimes it's a correction, and then sometimes it's a turn back to where you should be. I guess it all depends on where you are in the drift. I think I'm a little off course.
Thank you, God, for the reminder that you don't move, that I can always return to you, and that you will keep your promises even when I forget.
It's a good thing Jacob was a part of the legacy. God made a promise to Abraham and he kept it to Jacob, protecting him from the consequences of his actions. In this one time, Jacob's entire family/tribe could have been destroyed. Instead God reminded him of where he started, sending him back to Bethel where he met God in the first place. Some returns are easier than others, aren't they? Sometimes it's a correction, and then sometimes it's a turn back to where you should be. I guess it all depends on where you are in the drift. I think I'm a little off course.
Thank you, God, for the reminder that you don't move, that I can always return to you, and that you will keep your promises even when I forget.
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