Unexpected gifts

I love to get gifts. I'm sure that at the ripe old age of 35, I should be completely over that, but I'm not. I love gifts. It's not about the price tag. It's about the surprise. The wrapping paper and the surprise.

I've determined that may be part of my difficulty getting into the Christmas spirit, everything is scripted and done according to the list and everyone is appreciative and we move on. There's nothing really wrong with that except...I like to give thoughtful gifts, spontaneous gifts, to people who appreciate those things. Luckily, I work with creative types who would appreciate that. Or, at the very least, appreciate pretty wrapping and bows. Unfortunately, my brain is mostly worn out this time of year so I go with predictable instead.

Last week I got a package at work from a designer who has become a friend. I thought it was work, so when I saw a gift instead...how exciting! A Psalms desk calendar with a lovely note..."I saw this and thought of you."

I love the gift (from someone who is a much better friend than I am, but that's really to be expected!), but even more, I love the note. OK, well, as much anyway. I needed the reminder. I want to be that kind of person...when a friend sees a Psalms calendar, I want them to think of me. I want to be thought of as someone who appreciates God's word. And, even when I don't know it, someone might be thinking of me.

Father, thank you so much for surrounding me with good friends. This time of year is hard and loneliness comes unexpectedly because I feel a little out of step in my family sometimes. It's good to know that my steps are just different, I'm in step with other people. Who like me, not because we has the same parents but because they like me. Help me to remember what's important and that you never leave me alone. And Father, I want people to know that I'm yours, when they see me, they think of you. Help me to be that person.

52 Blessings Week 3: Snow Days

So you won't see a picture of snow, because there wasn't any to speak of, only ice. But I was safe and sound at home with a free day that normally would have been spent working, so I worked...on Christmas. The blessing here is that the extra time couldn't have come at a better time. In the midst of the craziness that is the holiday season, extra time in hard to come by. Work is crazy. And then home is crazier with the shopping and for me, the cooking and cleaning.

It's difficult to find peace and joy at what should be the most joyful and peaceful season. Some are energized by that. Me, I just want to be quiet. And if I can do that at home, even better. So I cooked a little, crafted a lot, and crossed items off of my list, and as a result, I felt better about celebrating with my friends and I've moved on to the next hurdle: cleaning my house. If you could see it, you'd understand how high this hurdle is! And then the turkey is lurking...the source of most of my Christmas stress.

Thank you, Father, for unexpected gifts. They're the best kind! Thank you for the chance to organize myself and spend a little extra time on the people who make my workdays better.

52 Blessings Week 2: Working with Friends

Proverbs 17:17 (New International Version)
A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for adversity.

I was thinking hard on the way in to work this morning about the best thing to post today for week 2 of my assignment. I think the original goal on Photojojo was to practice my photography skills. So far, that hasn't panned out but I think it's even more important to think about my blessings. That's my story and I'm sticking to it (but there might also be something to the fact that my schedule is crammed, my camera is out of it's normal place, I'm too busy/lazy to get it and set something up right now, I only do things at the last minute...).

So today my picture is from our Halloween competition here at work and it's just a small representation of my friends here and why working with them is good for me. From this photo, you can tell that my friends are creative with great senses of humor and fun spirits (and maybe they're just a little...different. Like me). It's a little harder to tell is how generous they are, how good they are, and that each one is a good friend. Each person in that picture has gone above and beyond the call of "co-worker" for me. And there are more here, people who aren't in the picture.

I was thinking about this and I guess that spending 8 hours a day together, for years and years and years and years...and years, under the pressure of never-ending deadlines will probably make you best of friends or mortal enemies. And some of them I've even made road trips and worked trade shows with...and we're still friends. In fact, under pressure, I'm the first one to crack and my bad stuff spills out but they still make room for me and laugh with me and forgive me. Good friends.

I do thank God for placing me in the middle of this group of people. They are a blessing.

2 Thessalonians 1:3 (New International Version)
3We ought always to thank God for you, brothers, and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love every one of you has for each other is increasing.

Nicodemus

Gohere to read John 3.

In John 3, we have the powerhouse verse found on signs at every sporting event around the world. I'm going to look at something different in this chapter: Jesus' conversation with Nicodemus, a Pharisee who sought out Jesus to find out more. Pharisees have a pretty bad reputation but it seems that Nicodemus was faithful, a teacher, and yet also curious about Jesus. And he just couldn't grasp the idea of being "born again."

As someone who has lived her entire life smack dab in the middle of the Bible belt, it's hard to imagine a time and place where being "born again" isn't understood. But it's kind of a difficult thing to grasp. And as Jesus said to Nicodemus, "I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things?"

Nicodemus was a learned man and honestly curious to know more...and he just couldn't get it, couldn't understand that Jesus brought new life through a rebirth, not physically here but spiritually. I like this story, especially compared to the next chapter with the Samaritan woman because I think we see these same conversation every day...the super religious who know the right things to say and may even be genuinely seeking Christ like Nicodemus who struggle and sinners like the Samaritan woman who hurt and only have to be offered an option to grab hold of it. Both are sinners, both come to Christ, but with vastly different experiences. How lucky we are that Jesus came to save the lost, no matter their position in society. And even more lucky that Jesus had a message to reach them both...and you...and me.

52 Blessings: Week 1 Christmas Decorations

So in the effort to stick with my new plan to at least post once a week with a blessing as a part of the "52 Blessings" idea from Photojojo, I have my first post ready. Unfortunately my photo isn't really worthy of showing to people who love photography...not very artsy anyway. Still, it works for this.

Week #1-Christmas Decorations...at work
I work for a company where Christmas is present every day of the year, thanks to publishing 2 large Christmas craft books. It takes A. Very. Long. Time. to do this. Even when it's melting hot outside, there's Christmas something hanging around here. But I think it goes deeper than that too. I'm lucky to work for a place that will put up a beautiful nativity set in the lobby. All visitors will see that nativity. And I see it every time I ride on the elevator (and that's a lot because the Diet Coke is on the first floor but I live on the second floor...and I'm lazy so I ride).

I like that it's still "Merry Christmas" around here. Santa and his reindeer and "Happy Holidays" are here too, but Jesus and the manger haven't been hidden away.

John or not John

This is a note for BK, who left comments on the post "John, whom Jesus loved" because there's discussion about who the Beloved Disciple is..John or not John. The writer of the gospel is anonymous and early church tradition attributes it to John. If I'm reading correctly, it appears that an argument exists that the Beloved Disciple is actually Lazarus (from John 11). It's an interesting argument and there's more to it. As it is called the Gospel of John, I'll probably continue to call him John but I'm really trying to find out more about Jesus. Check out more online if you're curious.

So the disciples will believe

Click here to read John 2.

In John 2, it's easier to see how John has carefully chosen the accounts of Jesus that he includes and he also provides some extra insight so that we, the readers, will understand the man and his actions. In this chapter, John tells about Jesus changing the water to wine at the wedding in Cana and clearing the temple...2 very different stories, but in each, his followers come to know more about him.

So Jesus and his party go to a wedding and when the wine runs out, Mary tells Jesus about the problem. He tells the servants what to do and they do it and better wine than they'd had before is now in the waterpot...and no one knows about it except Mary, the servants and the disciples. And about this miracle John says:

This, the first of his miraculous signs, Jesus performed in Cana of Galilee. He thus revealed his glory, and his disciples put their faith in him.

From this story we know that Jesus was working on God's timetable, waiting for His direction and command to make himself known. Clearly, fixing the problem wasn't that difficult. And he didn't do it because Mary asked him to (she didn't but she put her faith in his decision) or for his own glory (not a very public display of his power) but to strengthen the belief and knowledge of the men following him.

Then there's the story in the temple, a very public display of his righteous anger, his power, and his conviction. Jesus clearly felt anger at the commercialism in the temple, the place were believers should worship and bring others. From the private miracle at Cana to the public stance at Capernaum, Jesus was building his name. And first, he strengthened his disciples, who were learning him and even though they didn't believe yet, they knew his power, and then he proclaimed his authority:

17His disciples remembered that it is written: "Zeal for your house will consume me."18Then the Jews demanded of him, "What miraculous sign can you show us to prove your authority to do all this?"
19Jesus answered them, "Destroy this temple, and I will raise it again in three days."
20The Jews replied, "It has taken forty-six years to build this temple, and you are going to raise it in three days?" 21But the temple he had spoken of was his body. 22After he was raised from the dead, his disciples recalled what he had said. Then they believed the Scripture and the words that Jesus had spoken.

23Now while he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Feast, many people saw the miraculous signs he was doing and believed in his name. 24But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men. 25He did not need man's testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man.

And then, just as today, there were people who said they believed. It would be difficult in the face of clearly miraculous signs to not believe. Right? Maybe. But then, as today and certainly someday when we meet Jesus again, Jesus didn't need to hear what they said. He sees the heart.

So from these stories, what do we know about Jesus...
Social-he was out in the world, enjoying a festive occasion like a wedding
Committed-he could change the water to wine for his mother, but the calling from the Father was more important.
Power-making wine from water was simple
Anger-clearing the temple is about returning the focus to the worship of God
Authority-Jesus did not hestitate to run the men out of the temple and when he was challenged, he had an answer.

Jesus, the One

Click here to read John 1.
John's gospel was written in view of a single critical goal. And it wasn't to be a historical record of Jesus' days here or to prove that he fulfilled prophesy. Here's what John said about the "why" of this gospel:

Jesus did many other miraculous signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name. John 20:30-31

As simple and as important as showing that Jesus was the Son of God so that we may have life. The signs, the sermons, the actions recorded here are here only to show us who Jesus was and is from one who knew him better than anyone. So what do we know about Jesus from Chapter 1?


John 1:1-3; John 1:10-14 (New International Version)

The Word Became Flesh
1In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2He was with God in the beginning.
3Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.

10He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. 11He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. 12Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— 13children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.

14The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

So what do we know...
Jesus is the Word, and the Word is
Eternal-he was with God in the beginning, a part of God.
Creator-nothing is made except that he made it
Incarnate-the Word came to the world as a man
Personal-he came as a man to save his own people and then made it possible for anyone who believes to become a child of God
Singular-this Word, this man, is the One and Only. There is no other who comes from the Father.

This may be the hardest part of Jesus to understand. The historical Jesus is a little easier because the 33 years he was actually here in the form of a man are easier to imagine. We have words here, accounts from the people who lived with him, but the eternal aspect or the "God" part of Jesus is difficult to grasp. Even the idea of being the Son of God is easier to understand for me. For some reason, it seems OK for God to be a mystery but I want to be able to wrap my mind around this man called Jesus.

John didn't seem to have the same trouble. I wonder how long it took John to understand it all. It does not seem that the disciples automatically comprehended the true power of Jesus. It seems that would have been trembling puddles if they had.


Other important pieces of Chapter 1:
John the Baptist as witness. John the Baptist was preaching the coming Messiah and he baptised Jesus and recognized him as the one. John had a sign to confirm it: the dove that came down during the baptism.

And 2 of his disciples: Andrew and John (the Gospel writer) left him to follow Jesus.
How'd you like to be Andrew? The first of the disciples to follow and bring his brother...good ol' Simon Peter...to Jesus.

How many names do you see? Where do they come from? Prophecy, the religious understanding of the day, the unique being of Jesus, each one shows a piece of the character of Jesus.
Word, light, life, Rabbi, Teacher, Messiah, the Christ, Lamb of God, Son of God, King of Israel, Son of Man

John, whom Jesus loved

I decided that for December I'd take a look at the book of John. If you ask me why, I'd have to say something about it seeming like the thing to do at the time. The reasons aren't very black and white, but at this time of year, we talk a lot about the "reason for the season" and we sing songs about silent nights.

And that's all so important. But I think that to too many people, Jesus is either the baby in a manger (although they don't pray to baby Jesus like Ricky Bobby, I hope) or he's a sacrifice on a cross (and maybe he's still there for you, but he should be so much more). So I wanted to take a look at the gospel written by the disciple "whom Jesus loved."

John, one of the inner circle, wrote his gospel close to the end of his life, many years after Christ's death and resurrection, and after the other gospels were written. So why write it? He didn't write it for a person or even to reach a group of people. John wrote it to show the world who Christ was, so that every person could know him and believe.

To John, Jesus was a man but so much more. John didn't know the baby and met Jesus as he began his ministry, traveled and worked with Jesus, saw the signs of the Messaiah, saw his death and resurrected body and he believed. And he became a leader of the church. I've mentioned before that I really identify with Peter, mainly because he messed up. A lot. But now I'm curious about John. He may turn out to be one of the perfect people...and he probably should be to be that close to Jesus, but I'd still like to know more.

And to encourage my study, I ran across these quotes.

"Martin Luther said that if we whould lose all the books of the Bible except two--John and Romans--Christianity could be saved."

"An old story suggests that an agnostic was challenged by Henry Clay Trumbell to study the Gospel of John. After emerging from his skeptical analysis, the man told Trumbell, 'The one of whom this book tells is either the Savior of the world or He ought to be.'"

Now are you curious too? Who do you say he is?
Let's take a look at it with new eyes. I want to see the Jesus that John knew.

52 Blessings

So, as usual, I've gotten distracted and forgotten to post the way I should. It only gets worse around the holidays when my true funk kicks in (if the definition of "sickly" is low energy and given to depression, I'm entering my sickly phase. See you in March). Now I have a plan. Everything in my life runs on deadlines, so I'm going to make sure I have to post at least once a week. I got my Photojojo newsletter (for people who like photography) this week, and true to the Thanksgiving theme, it's about things you feel grateful for or there's another assignment called "52 Blessings." So basically, I need one blessing a week. Surely I can swing that, right? I'll start it the first week of December. The best part is that they don't have to be earth shattering...there's nothing better than just being happy and doing good. That comes from the verse below, found in Ecclesiastes, right after the "Time for Everything" list.

From Ecclesiastes 3
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God.

When was the last time...

I was reading a Christian blog written by the pastor of NewSpring church, Perry Noble, and came across the question, "When was the last time you went to church expecting God to speak to you?"

I think expectation is part of my challenge. I go to church because I'm supposed to. Most of the time, that's why. I guess I expect to enjoy it, to check it off my list, and then get on with the demands of the week. I pray because I'm supposed to. Most of the time, that's why. I expect to check it off the list and then go back to the next problem. There are times when I desperately want to hear God speak, and because of the problems that I have with my expectations day to day, it's difficult to hear God speaking.

One of the things I want to take a look at is the difference in waiting and expecting. I think I wait instead of expect and I just know there's got to be a difference.

I just did a very quick search on waiting, and this verse from Micah seemed to fit...watching in hope...that's probably where I need to step it up a little.

Micah 7:7 (New International Version)

7 But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD,
I wait for God my Savior;
my God will hear me.

Inspired

It's been a few days since our last video post, so here's another. I really don't understand why people want to add cheesy graphics and weird "Jesus" pictures to perfectly nice videos, but this is the best I've found to go with this Steven Curtis Chapman song.

I'm posting it because yesterday, as I was driving in to work, this song played, and about the time "you whisper and my heart begins to soar", the tears started. It's such a question: Where is the hope of London? Where is the hope for Africa? Where is the hope for the beggar...or the rich man...or me? I think the timing has to do with my response because we were facing an election where the biggest word is "change" and people are desperate for something better. Politics isn't the answer, but hope is.

Whether it's the on streets of London, the children of Africa, every man and woman, boy and girl...every single person needs hope.

And the fact of the matter is that president-elect Obama is just one man. He has a powerful message, but he's just one man. And the truth is that God is in control. And if we want change, we're going to have to make it. And it has less to do with clean energy or fiscal policy or bipartisanship and more to do with living as we've been called to live. Democrat or Republican, the greatest commandment is the same: Love one another. And honestly, if we could just do that, we could change the world.

(Stepping down off the soap box now.)

Abide: Ask

In John 15, Jesus says:
If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

4. When you abide, you ask and God moves.

James 4:3 (NASB) says:
3You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures.

I was looking up verse 2 which says, "You do not have because you do not ask." And this is a problem with me, for sure. I don't ask...until it's really, really big. And often, when I do ask, it's because I have the wrong motives. Either way, I don't have. And this right here, this issue, this promise is where I get hung up over and over. God is good. I want what God has for me. I ask for His direction.
But...I hold something back. I want the good things for sure. But do I really want to take the steps to get there? Especially when they are unclear?

Today I'm saying I do. Father, I want your will for my life. I want to abide in you, to be close to you, to fulfill my purpose in you. Help me abide in you daily, to see where you are working and understand my part and then give me the courage to pursue it. Help me to ask with the right motives for the blessings that I know that you have for me and to maintain the right heart so that I can be used by you.

Abide: His word

3. To abide, you have to know what Jesus says. His words also abide in you.

Psalm 119:11 (New International Version)
11 I have hidden your word in my heart
that I might not sin against you.

The more I study, the clearer it becomes the less I know. You know? As I read what Jesus says about abiding, it's clear to me that one of my problems is not knowing His words well enough. In John 15, Jesus says that I should abide in him and his words in me. I have the kind of memory that will sometimes allow me to get the broad idea, but not the word-for-word...and that's probably not so good either. And any test better be on the New Testament because the OT can get a little fuzzy. So, uh, here's a sticking point...I see something to change and it's pretty clear on where I need to go...more words, more OT words, more study period.

So, now what am I going to do about it?

Abide: what sorta fruit are you bearing?

2. To abide means that you will bear fruit.

Am I bearing fruit? I'm not sure. I do know what the fruits should be though.
Remember what Paul says about the fruit in Galatians 5? And we're all supposed to have the fruit.

Form the NIV:
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Here's how the Message says it,
22-23But what happens when we live God's way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.

As I've always thought about this, bearing fruit seems like an on again, off again thing in my life. One time I get it right, the next time I get it wrong...sometimes minutes apart. So maybe the test on abiding is a minute-by-minute kinda thing. Am I bearing fruit now? How about now? Now? And then practice makes perfect? Even this I think is tied to seeing others the way that God sees them, looking through His eyes. It makes all the difference.

Abide: What's love got to do with it?

So we know the basic, critical, gotta-have commandment to abide: Love one another.

Here's what Paul says about love, Message-style, in 1 Corinthians 13:
So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.

When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!

But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

And I'm so glad I looked this up in the Message just for the last 2 sentences. Now, the definition of love is tough. Puts up with anything? Doesn't want what it doesn't have? I am in SO MUCH TROUBLE! I think I'm going to have to meditate on this one a while to recover.

Abide: The commandments

So as I'm reading this, I'm looking for parts of the definition of "abide" according to Jesus. From John 15, I know:
1. To abide, keep my commandments.
Easy enough, right? So what are the commandments? Further in John 15, jesus says this, Message-style:
--
I've loved you the way my Father has loved me. Make yourselves at home in my love. If you keep my commands, you'll remain intimately at home in my love. That's what I've done—kept my Father's commands and made myself at home in his love.

I've told you these things for a purpose: that my joy might be your joy, and your joy wholly mature. This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. You are my friends when you do the things I command you. I'm no longer calling you servants because servants don't understand what their master is thinking and planning. No, I've named you friends because I've let you in on everything I've heard from the Father.

You didn't choose me, remember; I chose you, and put you in the world to bear fruit, fruit that won't spoil. As fruit bearers, whatever you ask the Father in relation to me, he gives you.

But remember the root command: Love one another.
--
So, it's just as simple and as difficult as that to keep His commandments: Love one another.
This one's going to take some work. People aren't easy to love most of the time. It is easy to love some people, of course. But then, there are the rest of us. OK, like me, if you're one of the easily lovable. Obviously, the key to loving the unlovable is to see them the way Jesus sees them. He's managed to love me that way so I know it works. I just have to figure out how to adjust my vision and make it stick that way.

Abide: Jesus in John 15

John 15 (the only place I find "abide" right now), Jesus says:
I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser.Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit.You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you.

Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned.

If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples.

Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full.



As I mentioned yesterday, this comes from the New American Standard translation because that's were I could find "abide" used instead of "remain" and I think the key to what God is saying to me is tied to abiding, not remaining. I do think it's interesting that this section also contains one of the biggest faith challenges I've ever faced: the promise about asking whatever you wish and it will be done for you. The only way that can be true is that it's tied to the condition of abiding in Christ. It just really sounds so simple, doesn't it? Just do it. Just abide in my love and you'll bear fruit and have joy.

Why is it so hard?

Abide: John 15:4

New International Version (NIV)
4Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.

New American Standard Bible (NASB)
4"Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me.

The Message (MSG)
4"Live in me. Make your home in me just as I do in you. In the same way that a branch can't bear grapes by itself but only by being joined to the vine, you can't bear fruit unless you are joined with me.

When I began looking for more information on what it means to "abide" in the Bible, the only verse I could sort of remember was from John 15. And my Bible didn't have a reference for abide because it's NIV. In the NIV, the word is remain. Do you think abide and remain are the same thing?

I love Biblegateway.com. It's never been easier to search for the words you can sort of remember or to compare translations. NIV is my usual, but I like to also check the NASB and the Message, just to see the difference. And the Message is always different! But I like it because it's usually just a different way of looking at things I've heard all my life. Sometimes you just need a fresh perspective.

So are abide and remain and live the same thing? Here are the definitions from dictionary.com.
Abide
1. to remain; continue; stay: Abide with me.
2. to have one's abode; dwell; reside: to abide in a small Scottish village.
3. to continue in a particular condition, attitude, relationship, etc.; last.
4. to put up with; tolerate; stand: I can't abide dishonesty!
5. to endure, sustain, or withstand without yielding or submitting: to abide a vigorous onslaught.
6. to wait for; await: to abide the coming of the Lord.

Remain:
1. to continue in the same state; continue to be as specified: to remain at peace.
2. to stay behind or in the same place: to remain at home; I'll remain here when you go to the airport.

Live:
1. to have life, as an organism; be alive; be capable of vital functions: all things that live.
2. to continue to have life; remain alive: to live to a ripe old age.
3. to continue in existence, operation, memory, etc.; last: a book that lives in my memory.
4. to maintain or support one's existence; provide for oneself: to live on one's income.
5. to feed or subsist (usually fol. by on or upon): to live on rice and bananas.
6. to dwell or reside (usually fol. by in, at, etc.): to live in a cottage.
7. to pass life in a specified manner: They lived happily ever after.
8. to direct or regulate one's life: to live by the golden rule.
9. to experience or enjoy life to the full

As I look at the defnitions, they are very close, even connected. What I want to know is more about what it means to abide. I don't think it means to remain in the same place, so I'm going to take a look at more of this chapter. Maybe that will give me a better picture.

Abide

ABIDE
To remain in a place.
To continue to be sure or firm; endure.
To dwell or sojourn.

Last week, I certainly didn't spend my time as well as I should have. Most of the time, my brain was more preoccupied with the "Ahhhh!" feeling of beautiful days instead of deep thoughts. While I was at Garvan Woodland Gardens, I had plenty of time to think in quiet, contemplative spots on shady paths. There were very few people to interrupt me. And as I walked, I finally clicked on to pray. And the word that kept coming to me, either from my own head or the Spirit, was "abide." As this is not a word that I use often, I really needed to do a little study.

First, a definition: remain in place, endure. That seems clear enough, right? And what does the Bible say? I did a little research. That's coming up next.

The old vs. the new

Colossians 2:20 If then you have died with Christ to material ways of looking at things and have escaped from the world's crude and elemental notions and teachings of externalism, why do you live as if you still belong to the world?

So this is going to be a roundabout (and is tied to having some Darcy pictures that need to be shown), but in one of those weird times where I wake up in the middle of the night, can't go back to sleep, and think too much, I was thinking about how much Darcy enjoyed living life unleashed last. This is an old dog, raised in the 'burbs, by a nervous person who maintains firm control of the leash any time we venture out into public. She's a labrador mix who never saw water until she was 4 years old. But when she found water, she knew exactly what to do with it...jump right in.

Last week, she approached jumping off the dock with caution but interest. And this just makes me think about how dogs, no matter what breed, have a memory of what they were bred for, even though they might have been thouroughly yuppie-fied. Shelties herd, labs swim, beagles trail...that's just what they do. Stopping them from doing those things is the challenge. Preventing them from swimming or running around your feet or barking all the time, they have to learn those things.

So we're sorta the same. We're born with one nature and, if we're lucky, we learn to use some pieces of that and then to change what needs to be different. Really, I just wanted to put up more Darcy pictures.

It's only temporary

From heaven even the most miserable life will look like one bad
night at an inconvenient hotel.

-- Teresa of Avila

This quote was delivered to me last week while I was learning about a few "bad" nights in an "inconvenient hotel." I vacationed in a real-life fishing cabin and learned that even I have a level of decor that I'm comfortable with. Everything was fine but it took a little adjusting to, particularly the kitchen. I rather imagine heaven itself to be more like the lake view from the deck while this life will look more like this stove...a little dirty, a little rusty, tired, worn out and in need of some serious overhaul.

Even convertibles get the blues

So I posted about the peace that a restful vacation on the lake can bring, and then I met Monday...147 emails, multiple voice mails, meetings, an excruciating mound of books crammed in my in-box, phone calls from family members about "opportunities" that became critical overnight and required my presence...and a flat tire.

A flat tire leads to a call to roadside assistance and a quick visit to put on my
too-low-to-drive-1-mile-to-the-repair-place spare. Stopped to put air in the spare
to drive to the tire shop to find out the flat can't be repaired and
they don't carry that size of tire and finding it in Little Rock will be
difficult. Return to work.
Make phone calls.
Find out that finding that size in Little Rock is not impossible just
very, very expensive. Drive to dealership to have new tires put on convertible because
driving the convertible is required to blow out all the rest of the clutter of the day.

Some days are just Mondays, you know? But even in those days there are good things:
Safety-made it to work at 6:30 Monday morning...before the tire went flat...in the dark...on the side of the road. Convenience-roadside assistance came right away to my work with one phone call and no money from me. I love my insurance.
Slowing down-driving as slowly as I did on that spare, that's a new experience for me. The world looks a little different. And the drivers a little angrier.
Restoration-it's only money, right? I found the tire(s), and everything is fine again. And as I have traded in another car for having a flat tire, it's a symbol of my love and need for this impractical car that I have. Well, maybe not, but it's all OK anyway.

Peace in this world is fleeting, but the good news is that it can be restored. Over and over if needed, but we can get it back.

Rest

Matthew 11:28-30 (Message)
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

This is the reason I wanted to get away, to be quiet and to think. Tired, worn out, and ready to recover my life, I am unable to focus on what needs to change so that I can have a life that makes a difference at the end of a day at work spent juggling priorities, going to meetings, answering questions, and always living with a deadline. Recently, it's become too much for me. I needed a break, really to see if I can determine "how to recover my life." And the trip didn't start off well...a creepy, webby cabin, no one around for miles apparently, and an anxious dog. I was ready to just go back home. It might be mind-numbing to consider all the work I need to do at home, but at least it's comfortable. After all, I have plenty of my own spider webs. I didn't need to travel to get that atmosphere. To cure the anxious dog, I took her for a walk down the hill...to see this view, and just like that, my burdens disappeared. In the quiet, breezy woods with waves lapping on the shore and a snoozing dog at my feet, I felt peace, a freer and lighter soul that my normal burden.

Father, I want that freedom and lightness of knowing that I'm on your path, not my own. I want to know that my day makes a difference. Thank you for sending me rest. Now, help me hold on to that lightness. Work is a challenge, give me your peace.

Religulous

It's a combination of "religion" and "ridiculous". Sorry, I know a few who won't get the word so I have to explain. And it's the name of Bill Maher's new movie, and by the title, you can guess the subject. I watched an interview last night on the Daily Show (it's where I get all my news, I can't help it) and I've been thinking about it since. Maher is not in the "there is no god" camp, according to what he says, but more in the "we can't prove there is a god" camp. And from the clips, this looks like a funny movie, but it is so very disturbing that what the world sees as faith is extremism, fanaticism, and often the fringe of every denomination, church, cult, or crazy idea that calls itself "religion". On the show last night, Maher compared Scientology to Christianity as the only difference is that one is new. And I could feel a rebuttal building in my chest but he couldn't hear me...he was on t.v.

This reminds me a little of the whole "I met Satan" post I earlier had where I said I really see God at work. As a reasonable, educated, young-ish, Christian woman, I tend to live in the middle of most arguments, neither conservative or liberal. When I imagine what the conversation is going to be over this movie, I want to rest my head for a few minutes. Here's why: the extremes are what you'll hear. And really, as a middle-way person, I'm more disturbed by Maher's points about the questions he asked normal people who call themselves religious. And they couldn't answer. I know that any deep faith discussion is eventually going to wind up at something that you just have to believe, and there are many elements of religion that are laughable. But the fact that this is the face of the church, what the world sees, is not funny.

Maher's biggest point seemed to be that a VP like Sarah Palin is a shining example of all that's wrong with this country. She believes the Bible literally so how could she be a reasonable person? I am not sure that she IS a reasonable person, but I don't blame that on believing the Bible or see that as evidence either way. It appears to me that her issues are inborn, personality traits or character flaws. Jon Stewart mentioned that faith does give us good things: morality, comfort. Maher answered by saying they were outweighed by war etc. I don't believe that faith causes wars. Religion might. Extremism certainly does.

Obviously Bill Maher is sharp with a very quick mind. That is crystal clear. It seems unfair to illustrate the ills of religion by setting his wit against the masses on the street. What I'd like to see is a match up against the best minds. There still may not be agreement but it should be harder to make the other person the butt of the joke. A person who has actually thought to determine what he or she believes and studied some to find the answers seems to be a little hard to find out on the streets of London. It's very easy to find people who believe what they've been told to believe apparently. Of course, he has done an excellent job illustrating the dangers: there are a whole lot more of them than there are of us.

Questions...I've got 'em.

Recently I've discovered that I just expect to be able to find answers when I search for them. In the Internet age, you can find a thousand places to tell you how to properly boil an egg. Don't believe me? Just do a search. I do know. I'm not much of a cook. Really, I'm not a cook at all. I used to call my mother every time I had to boil eggs. Now I search the Internet. Some things are just too embarassing to call and ask someone who you're still trying to impress. And that's one of my biggest problems: I'm still trying to impress, to look like I have it together, to pretend that nothing hurts or that I need anything more than I have.

Other searches are a lot more difficult to find the answers, even with all this information at your fingertips. And I know I should be talking about the big issues...what am I here for, is there a God, why do bad things happen. I just think I have all those things answered. I'm not searching for those answers. Mine are different: finances, electrical, rodent eradication, relationships, how to fix me, and other assorted pieces. And they all stem from me trying to take care of me. All on my own. I think I'm looking for...if you can do this, that, and this other thing, then yes, of course, this career path is for you. Or if he says this, he does that, and he's this kind of person...then this, without a doubt, is exactly what he means. And he is so into you. Follow this path. Go this way. Do this thing. And you will be happy.

Lately, I've sorta been having these conversations in my head. Ironically, they're about getting out of my head. Getting out of my way. Asking for help, direction, thoughts, suggestions from experts. Now, where can I find experts? Maybe I'll try Google...

God working

John 5
19-20So Jesus explained himself at length. "I'm telling you this straight. The Son can't independently do a thing, only what he sees the Father doing. What the Father does, the Son does. The Father loves the Son and includes him in everything he is doing.

As I was doing my Experiencing God study this morning, I thought a little about my post from yesterday about who was really at work...Satan or God. And the fact that even Jesus could only accomplish God's purposes here by watching to see where He was already working and going there.

How many times do we miss what's really going on? How many times to we see coincidence instead of God working? How many times do I let uncomfortable people make me miss what God is doing?

It's really something that I need to watch for. I know I'm missing it all the time. And all the time I'm crying out for God to show me His will.

Father, help me to see what you're doing so that I can be involved.

So, which is it?

John 8
43Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. 44You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father's desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.

I met Satan last week.

Those were the words that she began with during our prayer request time in Sunday school. And stupidly, the hair raises on my arms and I start to hear ominous music in my mind and look around for the axe slinging maniac. That's what evil looks like. Right?
As she went on to explain, Satan came in the form of a person who got into a very serious discussion with her on the existence of God. People were formed from the stars and the dust and there is no God. Incorrect, yes. Misguided, certainly. Hopelessly lost right now, yes. Satan? I don't know. This seems to be a very straightforward conversation for Satan to be starting. Why would Satan send that person up against another willing to share the truth? Why would he make it so easy to refute? Why would the father of all lies start this when this guy is clearly in his camp already? As she spoke, a couple of thoughts ran through my head.

We meet Satan every day of every week, whether it's in an unsettling conversation or not. He's there, maybe not boldly with flaming evil, but he's there in much more dangerous ways. This is what Paul says in 2 Corinthians
2 Corinthians 4:4 The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.
2 Corinthians 11:14 And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.

We know we'll encounter him...in philosophies that look so much like ours that it's hard to show how dangerously wrong they are and in people who put obstacles in the way because this faith is too easy or even in believers who would rather have the temptations of this world, but a head-to-head confrontation like this seems a little more rare. Even when he tempted Christ, his manner was deceptively logical. And really, I think my question is...is this Satan? Or is this God at work? Satan already has that one so it's a battle he can only lose.

And in the end, it probably doesn't matter who started the battle although I'm always going to hope for my own sake that God's already there working because it's not an argument I can win on my own anyway. The answer is still the same...see that person, that lost person, as God sees him. Don't be distracted by heated arguments or confused theories. See that person as God sees him, lost...but not without hope. That conversation means hope.

Personality?

Here's another true confession: I'm a little weird. I like to take tests. I especially like to take "what kind of popsicle/Austen character/superhero/color are you?" tests. To me, anytime I get to choose a button and have immediate scoring results, I am happy. I enjoy taking things like the GRE and the GMAT. I am an excellent test taker. You didn't really need to know that although it does explain a little about why I decided to take the Servants by Design personality test thingamabob. To find out more, click Your Unique Design. It has been recommended to me by more than one person and it was again by life coach Shane (apparently he's going to turn up in this blog as often as the Daily Show does in any political conversation I take part in).

So with my found time (waiting for Mr. Electric), I decided to take this test. And really, if I told you the choices were Achiever, Persister, Dreamer, Energizer, Catalyzer, and Harmonizer (and you know me just a little bit at all), you'd probably put my results in that order. And that's my order with Achiever and Persister at 100%.
Motivators:
While in the process of developing your Dreamer part, you are motivated to seek solitude and peace. You need to spend considerable time undisturbed by people, noises or outside interruptions.

Planning, organizing and completing meaningful tasks or projects will remain a priority for you. Recognition for a job well done by someone you respect and admire can be an excellent motivator, although you have the ability to work for long periods of time motivated by only your need to be responsible and do your best.

Abilities: communicating, planning, and overseeing.

Here are the pitfalls:
Occasionally you will feel powerless to change things, believing instead that you just have to be strong and endure whatever problems come your way.
When overloaded, you likely will begin to avoid phone calls and miss meetings.
Under pressure, you will tend to find yourself wanting to withdraw from contact with others.

Pitfall seems to indicate a dangerous or bad thing. So...I'm not sure the things listed above fit. Aren't they just things, neither good nor bad really? I would say they are 100% true. Many days at work, I just want to sit under my desk. Quietly. Overload, yes, but what do I do about that?

Now maybe I need someone to tell me what to do with the info, short of wrapping it up and handing it to my family to say that it is, indeed, OK for me to spend time alone. In fact, it's needed. And then also to my boss and co-workers who value my "answers and clear thinking" to explain why I am sitting under my desk and rocking, avoiding phone calls, and missing meetings. It's the Dreamer part of me under overload. Just one crisis too many at the moment...catch me later.

That might actually be a big help.

Calling vs. career

I think the point where I got a little "don't-cry-don't-cry" panicked at lunch was during the 4 questions:
1. Think about the time you felt the most alive. What were you doing?
2. If money and failure were not options, what would you do?
3. What do other people tell me I do with excellence?
4. What kind of legacy do I want to leave?

I've been working with Merry from Marketplace Connection for just a little while now, and we've had some conversation about career choices. She recommended a study called 48 Days to the Work You Love to me (and to a friend who was recently laid off). And I bought the book. And that's as far as it went. And here's why: I'm sorta afraid of the answer. If I find clear direction, what in the world am I going to do with it? I'm comfortable (sort of) right where I am. I know what to expect (sort of) every day. After lunch on Thursday, with some unexpected time off (waiting for Mr. Electric to show up...not as exciting as it sounds), I started Day 1.

And did some thinking about these questions.
The places I felt most alive are scary places! Out on the edge of my comfort zone:
-sitting on a hill overlooking a town in the Andes mountains in Peru, praying for those people and thanking God for that chance.
-sitting alone in a town square in a town in the Andes mountains, surrounded by children who speak Spanish...and I don't
-showering with a lizard in a town in the Andes mountains in Peru. If the cold water doesn't make you feel alive, keeping an eye on the lizard definitely will.
-photographing quilts in the streets of Dublin, Ireland, with possibly the best friend of my life
-reading, writing, and discussing great books in literature classes in college
-being critiqued in the only creative writing class I've ever taken
-speaking in the final class of my MBA gauntlet in front of a panel of business experts

Those are just quick answers, off the top of my head, but I think that fear may be the common factor.

If money and failure were taken out of the mix, what would I do? Clearly, study, and travel and write. Those are things that I see that I love. That I always have loved and that I always will love. But in the real world, money is a necessity and failure is very much an option with which I am intimately acquainted and live in dread of daily. So what in the world does that tell me? You know, I've been told by more than one person who loves me that I can do anything, but that's clearly untrue, so where's the line?

What do people tell me I do with excellence? I have no idea, but here's the real trick: if I can't do it perfectly, or at least excellently, I don't really want to do it. I really, really don't want to do it. I lose sleep over how much I don't want to do it. But if I look at what I do daily, I schedule, I plan, I problem-solve, I lighten the mood when I can. There may be other things.

And as for legacy, I've never thought about it. Who am I leaving a legacy for?

What about you? Can you answer these questions? There supposed to help us determine a calling, which is different than a career. A calling is our passion, our purpose. And we're all supposed to have one, right?

Remember Psalm 139? This is from the Message translation:
13-16 Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

All the stages of my life, the days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day...I have a purpose and work prepared for me. Father, show me what it is.

Work we had better be doing

Ephesians 2 from the Message;

7-10Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It's God's gift from start to finish! We don't play the major role. If we did, we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.

In the lunch on Thursday, life coach Shane read this from Ephesians. I was really looking forward to this lunch topic. I was just really hoping for some ideas. And I still had to do a minor "don't-cry" pep talk. And I was a little surprised by it.

I mean, a job is just a job, right? This one pretty much the same as that one. And just because most days in my current job I feel a little lightheaded because of the lack of oxygen in my office, thanks to overbearing burdens of too much work, not enough people, crazy deadlines and a feeling of the never-ending sameness of every day...wait, did I say that out loud? Anyway, aren't most places like that? I work for a good company with a great product. I like working with my friends. I like pulling pretty things out of boxes and seeing nice photos. I like lunch. And my skills are perfect for this job. I grew up here. I'm successful here. It's home.

Whether or not home is where I need to be, I don't believe crushing never-ending sameness is what my life should be about. As Ephesians says, I've been created to join Christ Jesus in the works he's doing, work I should be doing. I don't believe the place is the problem. I think the biggest problem is that I'm not plugged in to where God is working.

I don't know that this means a change of place. I do think it means a change of attitude. At the very least, there's something more I should be doing that requires some of the energy that leaks out of me during the day in my oxygen-light atmosphere.

So I think the first thing to do is to have the right attitude about work. And here's a confession: in my life, there is no small stuff. Every challenge is a big challenge, life or death, critical. It's never too soon to panic. And I know that's just not true. I can work hard enough, push hard enough, grind through, and plug every problem with a solution and still fail in the end because of something out of my control. So...learning not to sweat the small stuff might be a good step.

How in the world do I do that?

Lunch at Larry's

Today's the day for the Marketplace Connection lunch out at Larry's on Hwy 10 if anyone local wants to join it. Topic: No More Mondays!

Reaching the world

One of the headline stories on AOL.com this morning is about a preacher who has a series this summer based on the #1 movies. The link takes you to a sermon based on Wall-E and YouTube has a collection. The one above is on Indiana Jones and in it he explains his reasoning.

I think the most interesting part (because I believe I've actually seen this before or something similar) is the reaction to the videos.

There are a lot of people in the world who are a little angry about this, saying if you can't preach the word, you bring a circus or that he doesn't know enough of the Bible...fake, phony, etc.

Maybe I'm crazy, but I really don't see that Christ Chapel is doing unbiblical things. Christ met people where they were and he spoke to them as they were to reach them. I do believe that the points need to be supported by God's word. And from what I saw, they were. But giving a message to people that they can understand...I don't know that we should fault someone for that. Or for the idea that you can show others that God can speak...even through Hollywood.

I haven't seen his "Dark Knight" series but I'd like to. As I suffered through that dark, depressing un-happy Batman, I looked for bright spots. There's a point where humankind shows true goodness and respect...and the Joker can't believe it. But as I watched it I thought "Love one another" and there's got to be a message about a hero who suffers ridicule, suspicion, judgement, pain...and continues to fulfill the mission he's called to to save the world. There's just got to be.

Christ Chapel might be out on the edge, but there are lost people out on the edge as well. His style may not be my style, but I can't fault someone for trying something new to reach the world.

Spellbound

Psalm 45:11 (New International Version)
11 The king is enthralled by your beauty;
honor him, for he is your lord.

Ever met anyone enthralled by your beauty? Me, either. Unless you actually said "yes" and then I say "How nice for you." But I don't really mean it. I'm just that way sometimes. Most of the time. Really, all the time. "Charmed" by my quirks is my only hope.

Anyway, the definition of enthral:
1 : to hold in or reduce to slavery
2 : to hold spellbound : charm

As I've been casting around for another Bible study, I ran across a book and read this verse. Imagine...being beautiful enough to enthral a king, to charm a king.

I certainly don't feel all that spellbinding today, a day of answering questions and phone calls and making requests that don't get completed. It's frustrating, bends me out of shape and I feel more "beast" than "beauty" and don't have much inclination to get over it. And my clothes are too tight, my mouth is too loose, and my hair defies explanation. Add to that a king, a lord, who is enthralled by me, even when I'm the beast. And that's really love. What a gift.

Living with clutter

Proverbs 12:24 (New International Version)
24 Diligent hands will rule,
but laziness ends in slave labor.

I'm feeling a little like slave labor this weekend. My normal MO is that of a hermit. I go to work. I go home. I go out for necessities: food, Diet Coke, movies, and very occasional entertainment. The rest of the time I spend happy at home. I like it there. My dog is there.

But then I do something to mess up the plan. I invite people in. It's not that I don't like having people over. I do. I really do. But being a hermit means I don't have to worry about unexpected visitors. And the clutter gets out of control.

Here's the scene: a tottering stack of mail/bills, countless loads of laundry, yarn in every nook and cranny, books scattered higgledy-piggledy, layers of dog hair and dust. So after a month or so of laziness, I am slave labor. The problem is that my house has reached the state that I just can't determine where to start.

So I work some and then I regroup. I've determined that I just don't have a very high frustration threshold. What I mean is that it doesn't take long for me to work on a problem to get to the point where I am overwhelmed. I have to back off and come back at it. My house is like that. I think my spiritual life is like that too.

The mess in my heart is like clutter. One day at a time, I make a bad decision that pulls me away. And then the next I let something else in that has no place in my heart, but really it's not so bad. Until you look at a pile of those things and consider how much time it will take to get rid of it.

I sorta feel that way about laundry. I have many clothes. I wear them all before I do laundry. Day by day, it's not so much. But after weeks, facing that many loads of laundry feels like a crisis.

And in all things...whether it's cleaning the house, getting back on spiritual track, losing weight, or saving money...I expect immediate results. I want to correct in a heartbeat what it took days (or weeks or years) to build.

I know better than to pray for patience. Maybe I'll try diligence instead.
Back to the mines...

Why I'll never be president

As I was surfing around, looking for a good video that I never found, I came across all these clips of Rick Warren's interview of Obama and McCain. And I'll say this...I'm not political. But I really wonder about what this accomplished. They might have been different kinds of questions...but they were the same answers that we've heard for other questions. Right? Still, I never want to sit on a stage and be asked about my greatest moral failure. Really.
Of course, neither truly answered the question, but I don't blame them one bit. Imagining the stinging judgement that would come from my moral failures yesterday, never mind my greatest moral failure ever, would have me doing the sidestep as well.

It's hard to imagine a world where a political candidate could confess the truth to the world. I'm thankful that I can confess the truth to my God and know that the failure is wiped away, forgiven, forgotten, remembered no more. By God. On bad days, I still remember the times I've failed. Thank goodness they haven't been caught on tape to be run on 24 hour news.

I don't really want to hear about either man's greatest moral failure. I might be interested on what happened to change him, why that will never happen again. If it's the truty. What I want to hear is the truth...good, bad, or ugly...what's in the heart on the issues of the day. I suspect they're a whole lot alike. And that I won't get what I want.

What would it be like?

John 13:34-35
34"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

For some reason, this message of Christian unity keeps coming up around me...Bible study, messages, music, random conversations, and it's really so sad that the most important job we have, what should be the simplest, is the most difficult to get right. The church can't get it right, and so the world sees divisions and avoids the church because of the hypocrites. As one of those imperfect people who make up the church, I say that's just a convenient excuse, but I also know the church bears responsibility for that view. We squabble and fight, judge and pronounce judgement, draw lines over unimportant issues and miss the chance to show the world that we are Christ's disciples.

I like this song because it's happy. Happy like we'd probably be if we could get over ourselves and really learn to love one another, in the body of Christ first, then the rest of the world.

Set Free

While I'm finishing up the notes from Galatians, a Newsboys song occurs to me. "I am free."

That's what Paul wanted the Galatians to understand. They were free. We are free.

The song is good, but I couldn't find a video to go with. YouTube lets me down again. Then I was searching around and came across the video to a Casting Crowns song...so here it is. I'm not sure when this blog became a Christian video program but I really like the music and it runs through my head and I need a blog post...so here we are.

Galatians-Week 6-From the Inside Out

Paul finishes up his letter to the churches in Galatia with a little practical advice. First, he addresses handling sin, either in another believer or your own life.

Galatians 6
Doing Good to All
1Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.

Maturity vs. spirituality. Paul clearly says that each of us has a duty to pick up, hold up, and build up brothers and sisters struggling with sin. Well, those under the influence of the Spirit. Not the Bible scholars, not the grandmothers who've had decades of training...all of us living under the Spirit. Sin impacts us all...in our own lives, it robs us of joy, lessens our anticipation of Christ, destroys our usefulness...and it infects the entire body. To counter sin, every believer has an obligation to support fellow Christians...to help recognize sin, pray for freedom from it, and to share lessons learned.

9Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

And in every life, God's law of cause and effect is still in operation. No, we can't lose our salvation. Yes, we still face consequences for bad decisions. And we all make them. And when we do, the command to love one another so that the world will know that we are disciples becomes even more important.

14May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which[b] the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world. 15Neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything; what counts is a new creation. 16Peace and mercy to all who follow this rule, even to the Israel of God.

And to finish up his letter, Paul remind the Galatians one more time: what counts is a new creation, the Spirit at work in you. Nothing on the exterior amounts to anything. And that way is open to everyone.

Galatians-Week 5-Living with freedom

So, if I'm "free" now, that means I can do anything and get away with it, right? I don't have to live with God's law because of the grace, right? I'll just do what I want since I don't have to worry about the consequences.

Right?

Paul says: Turning back to the law invalidates both Christ and his sacrifice on the cross. It also hinders spiritual growth. Just don't do it.

So does that mean we have no rules?

Paul says: Yes...and no. Now that you have the Spirit, you don't need the rules.

Thanks to the Holy Spirit, we:
understand the truth of the Word.
can be changed into character of Christ, to live like Christ.
know what sin is and when we do it.
want to do the right thing.

Paul says:
2But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

Because we have the spirit, we have all these things (a.k.a. the Fruit of the Spirit (singular)):
Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness and Self-Control...against such things there is no law.

If you have the Spirit (and you do on the day you confess your faith in Christ), then you have the fruit.
And if you have the fruit, then you don't need the law. Love is better than law any day.

Remember what Jesus said about fruit? A good tree can't bear bad fruit...
Matthew 7:16-18 (New International Version)
16By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. 18A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit.

Of course, you're going to continue to struggle: the old man vs. the new creation. But now you can make the right choice. You have the freedom to make the right choice.

Christian unity

Psalm 133:1
How good and pleasant it is
when brothers live together in unity!

This is a message that keeps coming up: how important it is for Christians to get along. In Sunday School, we talked about the divisions that we put on our religions that have very little to do with salvation: whether your worship music has music or not, electric guitars or not, whether you drink or dance or not, what you wear, what translation you use, whether you boycott Disney or not... These are the kinds of things that the world looks at and sees that we can't get along. And really, it's just too bad that sweating the small stuff has such a huge impact on the big picture.

I wanted the song that runs through my head when I read this verse. I couldn't find it in the approximately 2.5 seconds that I devoted to the search tonight. However, this commercial for one of my favorite t.v. shows was easy to find. And it sorta goes with the idea. Loosely. Very loosely. Very, very loosely. Feel free to skip it if you'd like (Gus is my favorite. I like Gus).

Strength for today, bright hope for tomorrow

Isaiah 40:31 (The Message)
27-31Why would you ever complain, O Jacob,
or, whine, Israel, saying,
"God has lost track of me.
He doesn't care what happens to me"?
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?
God doesn't come and go. God lasts.
He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don't get tired,
they walk and don't lag behind.

I'm having a mood lately, I think. Or maybe it's a funk. Nevertheless, I want to stay home and soak in my place...just be me, with my thoughts and my dog and my hobbies and my rest. I feel weary, mostly mentally worn out but some physical wimpiness too. Maybe it's emotional, tied to the heavy weight of grief that still hits me 2 years later, especially around August 16, or the stress of working a job that becomes more of a challenge daily, or the anxiety that pops up for the people that I know and love who are also facing daily battles or the pressure that comes from knowing I should be doing more. All the time, I should be doing more, pushing harder to get it all done.

And really, isn't this just the way it is? While we're here, this is just the way it's going to be. The only answer: fresh strength.

Father, please give me fresh strength for this week. Improve my outlook and send me the renewed strength to accomplish your work.

This is a Call

I was working on the computer when this song came on the Christian channel I was listening to. So then I went to search YouTube...you can find everything there! The video is good, but the song reminded me of someone that I know. Well, more than one person that I know. I think we wait for burning bushes and angelic messengers to identify our opportunities sometimes. And, really, they are all around. The call is all around us.

The Need for Workers
35 Jesus traveled through all the towns and villages of that area, teaching in the synagogues and announcing the Good News about the Kingdom. And he healed every kind of disease and illness. 36 When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. 37 He said to his disciples, “The harvest is great, but the workers are few. 38 So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields.”

Still and quiet

Psalm 131
A song of ascents. Of David.
1 My heart is not proud, O LORD,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
2 But I have stilled and quieted my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.

3 O Israel, put your hope in the LORD
both now and forevermore.

Reading Psalm 130 from yesterday and Psalm 131 today back-to-back required a tissue. I'm going to blame it on the timing, but the truth is that I think any reference to being a child just really makes me remember. I'm thinking about another time when I watched for sunrise, at another hospital bed, this time my mother's. This time, I had snuck in to visit her on my way to work, just to see if I could do anything for her. Actually, probably to try to catch a doctor, but I'm sure that was wasted effort. I'm supposed to be at work at 7:00, so it was very early and she was still asleep. So I crept in and had a seat to wait, watching out the window for dawn. I can't really remember the why of the hospital stay. We were still battling the cancer at this point and I think she had some kind of fever. I just remember the feeling of dread there in the dark. I wanted hustle, bustle, light, life, and most of all, I wanted her to be herself. And to not feel so alone. Then she woke up, saw me, and snapped "And what are you doing here?" And everything was OK. She chased me out, back to work.

With a few more sunrises between the two, I understood why miraculous healing may not be the answer to prayer. It's probably not the right prayer. Thanks to my mother, I never had any night watches with her. She really wouldn't allow it. But I still prayed, not with the perfect expectation of youth, but with hope that God would answer my prayers for my mother. I'm not sure I trusted God to do the right thing for her. But He did. And in a way to clearly demonstrate to me that it was an answer, to demonstrate his love for her and for me, and to demonstrate that God is good. All the time. Now if I can just learn to expect that like I look forward to the dawn.

Father, help me to still and quiet my soul, even when I don't understand, trusting you.

Waiting for the dawn

I'm playing catch-up in my Tuesday night Bible study so I just ran across this.

Psalm 130
A song of ascents.
1 Out of the depths I cry to you, O LORD;
2 O Lord, hear my voice.
Let your ears be attentive
to my cry for mercy.

3 If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins,
O Lord, who could stand?

4 But with you there is forgiveness;
therefore you are feared.

5 I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
and in his word I put my hope.

6 My soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning.

7 O Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption.

8 He himself will redeem Israel
from all their sins.

Have you ever waited for dawn to come? The image here is of the watchmen, who sit at the city wall and watch for enemies through the night. Dawn means safety and success. For some reason, this really hit me with a couple of different memories in my life where I literally waited on the sun to rise, believing that sunrise meant safety and success. The first time was after a sleepless night with a very sick father, watching with my mother. In my mind, the changing of the nurses which coincided with the end of the first chemotherapy treatment around 7:00 a.m. was a goal, something to aim for that meant safety and success. Of course, at that point, on that night, in my youth, I knew that God was going to answer my prayers in just the manner I intended them: miraculous healing if that was what was required.

Just before that goal, when the sky was brightening, my father died. I don't remember sunrise or really much of anything until that afternoon, sitting on my mother's patio, stunned at how God seemed to have ignored my prayer. I really don't think I'll ever forget that night or the feelings of expectation...sunrise meant a new day, another reason to hope. And I completely understand the feeling of expectation the psalmist describes. We are to anticipate God's answer in exactly that manner as it means safety and success.

So then...why do prayers go unanswered? Are they unanswered? This was a hard lesson and it's one I'm still learning. In that case, that prayer was answered, not in the way I intended, but in the best way. It just took a few more times of watching for the sun to rise to understand it better, to understand why and how I can put my hope in the Lord.

Galatians--Week 4--Paul gets personal

In Chapter 4 of the letter to the Galatians, Paul completes his argument on grace's superiority over the law. To this point, Paul has been more like a lawyer arguing a case, but at this point, his tone changes to that of a concerned friend. There are 3 different ideas in this chapter:

Heirs vs. slaves-

4But when the time had fully come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under law, 5to redeem those under law, that we might receive the full rights of sons. 6Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, "Abba, Father." 7So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir.

During this time, children were often taught and guided by trusted slaves until they reached a certain age. While they were under this control, they lived like the slaves did. And then when they reached the age, they became full heirs of their fathers. In fact, they were always heirs, but they lived under the restrictions that slaves lived with until the time came. Paul is saying that if we choose to live under the law, we are still slaves. The time has come, God sent His son at the perfect time, so that we could live as heir instead of slaves.

17. What does it mean to be an heir? When I hear "heir," I immediately think of rich relatives and stunning fortunes bequeathed in the last will and testament. Since I don't have any of those, that must come from the movies. But this is sort of like that, because we are heirs to treasures that we can't even see yet. While we're here, being an heir is good but someday being an heir, or a child able to call God "abba" or "daddy" is going to be out-of-this-world!

Making it personal here...

14Even though my illness was a trial to you, you did not treat me with contempt or scorn. Instead, you welcomed me as if I were an angel of God, as if I were Christ Jesus himself. 15What has happened to all your joy? I can testify that, if you could have done so, you would have torn out your eyes and given them to me. 16Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth?

Paul changes his tone here to that of a confused and wounded friend or parent, someone who cares deeply what happens to these believers. How could they forget everything they did for him and what he taught while they were together?

And an OT analogy to round things up.

28Now you, brothers, like Isaac, are children of promise. 29At that time the son born in the ordinary way persecuted the son born by the power of the Spirit. It is the same now. 30But what does the Scripture say? "Get rid of the slave woman and her son, for the slave woman's son will never share in the inheritance with the free woman's son." 31Therefore, brothers, we are not children of the slave woman, but of the free woman.

Remember the story of Hagar and Ishmael? Paul uses Hagar and Sarah to illustrate life under the law, where man struggles to make his own plans to accomplish what he wants. That's Hagar's story. The contrast is following God's miraculous plan, represented by God's promise to Abraham and Sarah. Having a baby at 90...pretty much gotta be a God-thing. All believers are descendants of Isaac, not Ishmael, born of God's promise, not man's plan.

Seeing people the way God sees people

Matthew 9:36
When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

This was one of the verses that we studied over the weekend at the singles retreat and it reminded of something someone told be about trying to see people the way that God sees people. And really, I think if we could see the hearts of men and women around us, we'd all be moved to compassion too.

One of the examples that comes to mind is a church friend that I've alternately liked/envied. She's beautiful, really smart, has a great, close, loving family and seems very spiritually mature. And yet, she's single. Like me. As always happens when I start comparing myself to others, I don't measure up and that opens the door to all kinds of terrible feelings. And she has had nothing to do with any of it.

Then I spend time with her and realize she has her own issues...what she doesn't like about her face or her body, places where she admits she needs to work on her life, and she's facing her own battle...a parent with cancer. I have been there. Twice. I understand the battle. No matter how much you know God and love God and want God's will, you still want to ask questions and demand answers.

Outwardly, she has it all together and is in control. I do too. Inwardly, I suspect she's a little more disordered. I don't know about her, but this is a choice that I make daily...to look like I have it under control.

When I think about the groups I'm around and how many of those people are fighting their own battles, it really does break my heart. I understand how Christ could have compassion on those and call us to reach out them. To do so, I have to get out of my own head and build the relationships. That's the only way to find out what's in the heart.