You know how you feel when you're with people that you just feel comfortable with? Like you're OK no matter what form of dorky you are today? I have a few friends like that. Maybe that's just me. For some reason, even with people who I'm firmly convinced usually like me, I'm waiting for them to not like me, to think I'm just too...whatever it is that day...to hang with. And when I have to walk into a "party" with new people, I spend most of the day leading up to it in a pep talk..."You're good enough, You're smart enough, and, dog gone it, people like you." And then I usually do my best not to attract notice.
So, I'm trying a new church because I want to get involved with a group of people who believe what I believe and have similar lives...single Christians seem a good place to start. Cut to game night...me, driving over...I'll just see who's there and if I don't like it, I don't have to stay. Right, God? God says sure, while rolling his eyes probably. And as I'm parking, the girls in my Bible study drive up. No escape. And they don't allow me to hang back. And it was fine. It was good. So, I think none of us are cool...the heated Scrabble conversation over the word "koi" was my first clue. But they fit and I fit. And they already know about my weird New Year's resolution and my odd Pride and Prejudice obsession. How much worse could it get? Pretending to be cool takes too much out of me. I think I'll let that go. Maybe I'll just try to be real.
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