How it goes

When I think about how different I am on the inside compared to what I show the world, I start to wonder. I had this conversation with a friend yesterday about how the people in my Sunday school class don't really know me. Some of them have seen glimpses of me but they don't really know me. Because I don't let them. There are people around me who know more about the real me than others...and it isn't always who you'd think. It seems that it's harder to let church people know that I'm not all together than others who freely let me know that they are not all together. I'm not sure why I'm thinking about that today. I meant to post about prayer, this verse specifically.

Matthew 6
Prayer

5"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

I'm preparing to start a work Bible study. And the conversation in my head is always the same...
I can do that. I should be doing that. I did it before and it was fine. I can do this.
Then count it down to "go time" and the conversation changes....
What was I thinking? I can't do this. I don't want to do this. I'm not smart enough to do this. Prayer? I'm the worst pray-er that I know. How can I teach anyone what I don't know? How do I get out of this? I can't get out of this. God, help!

Father, you made me as I am and you know what I need before I ask you. What a gift that is. Please help me prepare, guide the right people to the study, and give me the words. I'm afraid to mess up here, but I know that you can accomplish great things in spite of me. Jesus taught us how to pray. Help us all understand what that means.